What does it mean to be happy? Is it an end goal? Is it something that you learn to define along the way? Is it the journey or the destination?
I think that we tend to believe that happiness is the destination, that it’s the place we are going to get to or a goal on a check list. Like we can just somehow mark it off, yes, I am happy now. Or we assume that it’s something that we don’t have to work at. We see people on social media who look like they have it all together, like they’re happy.
I don’t think that’s what it means. I don’t think that it’s something we just are one day and that’s the end of it. I don’t think that it’s something that’s going to just happen on a day to day basis. I don’t think that it’s easy to come by.
Everyone has shitty days. Everyone feels low. That’s just how life is. Ignoring those feelings, though, is just going to make it worse. Pretending it’s not there or feeling guilty for not being happy is not healthy. Sometimes, when you feel like a pile of garbage, the best thing that you can do for yourself is accept that’s how you’re feeling.
I’m sure that you’ve heard all of the ideas of how to be happier, how to be more thankful. I’m sure that you can find the things that work for you. Something thats always bothered me, though, is when we shit on what makes someone else happy when we don’t understand it.
What might make one person feel good might not do the same thing for you and that’s okay. It’s okay that you don’t get why someone is into something. But it’s not okay to make that person feel like they’re wrong.
Whatever makes you happy, as long as you’re not hurting anyone, is right. If it feels right to your own soul, that’s all that matters. Whether it’s staying in or going out, watching TV or going for a hike, having sex or not having sex, buying things that make you smile, it’s all valid.
For me, it’s simple things. I feel happiest when I am curled up on the couch with a blanket and a good TV show/movie/book. I feel happiest when I am sitting at my favourite cafe, working on a blog post. I feel happiest when I am sitting in my living room with my best friends, talking about life. I feel happiest when I am sitting in my mom’s kitchen, talking to her as she cooks. I feel happiest when I wake up on a day off and I hear rain pouring outside and I can curl back under my covers.
We all deserve a little happiness. That’s a lesson that I’m still trying to learn.
What about you? What makes you happy?